Monday, May 25, 2009

Make him chase the chunk!...

Once "mad men" start coming your way, you can rest assured you are really famous!
And when you see subtitles, you are a Star!
Comme moi!...

I was supposed to be Samantha...

Friday, May 22, 2009

Excellent advice for a stunning figure!

I missed you! I admit it!
I have a confession to make.
Before rumours start spreading, hear it from the horse:
I was on a meditating exercise. Lots of other famous people were there... But, I can't say more...
It was fabulous! We weren't supposed to speak for a whole week, which was rather difficult at first but then so "Children of a lesser God"!
Like a spa for my voice!
Here's a little something from my "better half":

Friday, May 15, 2009

Travis Davenport

Why are all the really cute men never credited, can anyone tell me?
Why do we keep their names (and numbers) a secret?
Yes, this is Audrey Tautou AND Travis Davenport people!
Height : 6'2"
Chest: 37.5
Men Shoe: 11
Hair: Light Brown
Eyes: Green
Travis has a twin brother named Brian who also is a model.
Can you imagine? If let's say, if, you get rejected, you have another chance!...

Thursday, May 14, 2009

My future boyfriend is now 1 year old...

Me and my friend Madonna have so many things in common. Success, fans, recognition...We also follow kabbalah and have the same taste in men apparently! I have to admit that I was recently mistaken, when I saw this picture in a magazine and I said to myself: "Quite old this new boy, Madonna is fighting to adopt"... Blame it on the skin tone I guess! This post is dedicated to my friend Madonna who always gets what she wants!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Should this even be up for discussion?

When fame knocks on your door, strange things start to happen, people are jealous and sometimes even cruel... My dear readers, I guess my genuine admiration for from the balcony has provoked my enemies and I am now compared to fictional characters! Can anyone really find any similarities to these pictures?

Friday, May 8, 2009

The three mouseketeers

Everyone, you would say, knows, thanks to Mr. Boyle, who they are, wouldn't you?... My dearest fans you have been mislead and I can no longer tolerate it!
Well, the time has come for me to speak, I have an obligation to you and to my art. They are certainly not
Athos, Porthos and Aramis. I don't know who thought of those ridiculous names anyway!

Britney, Justin and myself (I just zoomed in on the lovely couple, that's why you can't see me). This is a picture that proves more than one point: We were the three mouseketeers, Mr. Boyle long before you stole our fame (and on those Academy Awards you had so many opportunities to say " Thank you Jenna!" )...
Britney, if I may add here, is 29!
For all those who have something to say about my age!...

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Bobby Brown, now I understand!...

As part of my training as an actress, I was taught the method of methods approach. Since I was cast for the part of Janis Joplin I have to be her during this preparation period. Imagine, my dear readers, my discomfort when I was brutally forbidden to drive Janis Joplin's Porsche 356 convertible, as part of my dedication to the part, this idol, my fans!...
Whitney Museum, I never expected this from you! This is what I get for singing "Greatest love of all" for my birthday!

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

The Japanese Diet

All of you know by now that I tried the japanese diet.
A friend of mine, a porn star, recommended it. Well if you have to know, it feels like anorexia but with it's benefits! I got photographed a lot and some strange rumors began spreading, which of course was fabulous! My publisher forced me to quit, when he realised it had become a trend with other celebrities. I don't wanna go there but since you are about to ask, yes it was one of the twins (I never can say who is who with these two), Richie's (supposed) daughter, Ford's extremely younger (and badly botoxed) wife, even gorgeous Beckham's untalented ex-Spice!
I have to go to make-up...

Monday, May 4, 2009

Jenna is learning how to blog

My dearest fans,
First I would like to stress out that this is really me!
So please forgive me if I, due to my busy schedule, don't have the time to reply to the thousands of fan-mail I receive every day.